


love at first sight's for suckers (at least it used to be)

by TwistedLyssa



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: F/F, Idiots in Love, M/M, it's nina, she's in love with inej, useless bi girl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-29
Updated: 2019-12-29
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:14:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22019224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwistedLyssa/pseuds/TwistedLyssa
Summary: Nina Zenik somehow got into a very good college, and into a very good science program. Her friend group, however, isn’t what you’d expect. At all. The group seems to have an unbreakable dynamic, thought, that most people only wished for.One night, Nina confides in Kaz, because the guy rarely speaks. The cogs in his mind start to turn, and soon Nina is in over her head in things she never asked for.
Relationships: Inej Ghafa/Nina Zenik, Jesper Fahey/Wylan Van Eck (minor)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20
Collections: Grishaverse Big Bang 2019





	1. i

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! As part of the Grishaverse Big Bang, I bring you a Ninej fic :D  
> If you want to see wonderful art and edits based off this fic, head over to my tumblr (@musicgays) and you'll see a post with the links to everything.

Nina wasn’t one to confide in people. The few times she had done it, she had always been screwed over.

In one of her desk drawers, where her very pretty roommate never bothered to look, she kept a diary. The notebook itself was nothing like Nina: it had glitter all over it, tracing several rainbows in the cover. Okay, it was a bit like her;, she loved rainbows. Her little sister had given it to her when she left for college, so how could she throw it away?

That night, the whole group had planned an outing, but Nina told them she felt under the weather, and drinking until she passed out probably wasn’t the best idea, especially when exam season crept closer with each passing second.

She did feel under the weather, but her body was completely fine and could take on several rounds of tequila and vodka without a problem. Her mind, however, was not that fine. She missed her parents, and her sibilings, and her cousins, and her aunt and- who was she kidding? The only person she remotely missed was her younger sister.

It was that damn girl, that slept in the bed next to hers every night. She wasn’t in any of Nina’s classes, but fit right into their little friend group. Nina constantly thought about her dark wavy hair wrapped up in a braid, hanging off her back. Her eyes, that held all the world’s secrets and then some. Her slender figure, always in black leggings and a dark blue T-shirt. A black hoodie, too, if it was cold.

_Focus on your pen, Nina._

She just wanted to make these feelings disappear. Or make them bigger. She didn’t know which just yet. All she knew was that, if she didn’t vent in the next ten seconds, she’d probably implode.

So she wrote. And she wrote. When four pages were filled, she wrote some more. When her pen was almost running out of ink, she managed to scribble some more.

_Damn it, my pen ran out._

Nina decided trying to write more would only bring more sadness and make her hand cramp even worse. The small dorm room had a couch and a TV in a shared area, so she took advantage of the fact no one could judge her entertainment choices. TLC was her guilty pleasure, so why not?

Unfortunately not Not even TLC brought her spirits up, because whatever was on managed to be even more depressing than Nina’s love life. She needed to talk to a real person, now.

Obviously, she couldn’t talk to Inej, she was the one causing all the trouble to begin with. Not that it was her fault.

Jesper and Wylan, even though they went out with the group, were now probably doing unspeakable things somewhere else. Matthias was home by now, trying to pretend he didn’t just get drunk. He was a nice guy, but not the brightest out of the group.

Kaz. The guy who just didn’t take his gloves off and always walked around with a cane. He was the only one left Nina thought could talk to, and it meant the situation just hit rock bottom.

She grabbed her phone from the charger and dialed Kaz’s number. It rang once. Twice.

“Kaz!” Nina squealed.

_“Nina.”_

“Can I talk to you?” She shifted in her seat, mentally preparing for the conversation about to ensue.

_“Not going to promise that I care, but go ahead.”_

“So. Inej. She’s the only thing I can think about right now, and it’s driving me crazy. My anatomy notebook is filled with drawings of her and-”

_“You mean, Inej from our group?”_

She shifted in her seat. Was Kaz truly asking that question or was he just making fun of Nina? “Do we know any other Inej?”

_“Sounds like you really like her.”_

“Yeah, and that’s my problem. I have no idea what to do. I’ve just filled half a notebook writing about it. I need help, Kaz.”

_“Fear not., as I am’m here to help, my dear Nina.”_

“What? You’re not worried I just wrote more than twenty thousand words by hand in less than two hours?”

_“Not really, we’re all a bit weird.”_

This whole situation had surpassed the “weird” phase a long time ago. “Great, you’re not worried at all about this situation.”

_“No, Nina, you’re wrong. As your long time friend, I promise I won’t let it get as bad as Jesper and Wylan. Goodbye.”_

“What? Kaz-”

He hung up on her. He had the damn audacity to hang up on her.

The Jesper and Wylan situation. It hurt to watch. Jesper flirting senselessly with Wylan, and Wylan blushing and smiling in return. And of course, the drunken kisses they both excused as friendly kisses the next morning. And then, the whole closest locking thing.

Although, Nina was sure Inej would shut down someone’s flirting efforts before the person even said their first word, so trying it was no use.

And what did Kaz mean with all those weird sentences? _As bad as Jesper and Wylan._ At this point, Nina didn’t care and couldn’t bring herself to do it. All she wanted was to drift off to sleep and not having to think about Inej for the next few hours.

***

Sun rays streamed in through the window. Nina wanted to beat her past self for not remembering to just close the damn blinds. When she got up, she thanked all the Saints for creating weekends. After last night, her brain was not in good enough shape to learn anything of value. She did have exams coming up, but skipping studying for a day or two didn’t matter.

She looked to the side. Inej slept there, cuddling her white blankets and lightly snoring. Nina couldn’t help but stare at the girl for a little while. In sleep, she almost thought Inej couldn’t kill a person with a single punch.

When the sleeping girl rolled to the side, Nina swiftly left the bedroom, afraid she would be caught staring.

There was a space in the dorm room that vaguely resembled a kitchen. A countertop held a microwave oven and a coffee machine. The cabinets under had cereal. Just cereal, because Inej hadn’t done the grocery shopping yet, and Nina couldn’t be trusted with it. She grabbed a bowl from one of the overhead shelves and dumped Lucky Charms into it.

Kaz’s words from last night kept playing in her mind over and over as she made her way to the couch. Kaz’s help was… usually unorthodox. Not usually, always. His way of telling Jesper and Wylan to get it together was locking them in one of the various janitor’s closets. Twice.

TLC had something on that was better than last night. It was that weird addiction show. Nina almost vomited watching most of the episodes, but it was either that or watch the weather guy repeat _“Hello, people! Today we’re having a beautiful sunny day!”_ for two hours.

Someone knocked on the door. Nina put down the half eaten bowl, got up from her lazy spot on the couch and opened it.

It was Kaz, holding on to his crow cane. “Hello, dear Nina. May I come in?”

“Always so damn fancy.” She gestured towards the inside of the dorm, and Kaz walked in. “Can you tell me what you have planned?”

“Stressed much? I haven’t had a chance to sit down yet.”

“You can say I’m stressed.” Nina waited until Kaz was comfortable on the couch and joined him.

“So, how’s our pretty girl?” he asked, twirling his cane. He had a mischievous smile that Nina did not like at all.

“If you’re referring to me, I’m not good. If you’re referring to Inej, she’s still asleep, so please don’t wake her up.”

“Perfect. Last night, she told me she needs a partner for one of her dance projects. And before you ask, she isn’t paired off with anyone from her class, or from outside her class, so she needs someone.”

“I suppose you told her about me?”

“I may or may not have offered your services. As always, I plead the fifth. Anyways, have a good day. Oh, do something about all this before I do to you what I did to Jesper. It was hard to get the janitor’s keys twice.”

“Will do.”

With that, Kaz exited the dorm room like he’d never been there.

Uh, Inej needed help for a dance project. She looked at herself and wondered why she had accepted the offer. Nina wasn’t exactly the mainstream image of a dancer one wanted for, well, anything related to dance. But again, Inej wasn’t in the mainstream either. None of them were.

She heard steps coming closer and closer to the small living room.

“Nina, you up?” Inej asked. Oh, the angelical voice. Nina had almost forgotten about it during her talk with Kaz.

“Yeah, why?”

“Nothing.”

The small girl stood in the doorway, rubbing her tired eyes. She wore the same thing she always did, but this time, she had a glow Nina hadn’t noticed before. What had Kaz done to her? “Kaz passed by, said you needed someone for a project.”

Inej dragged her slender body over to the couch where Nina had spent the better part of her morning. “Yeah, that. Basically, I need to do a pair photoshoot that relates dance to a modern problem. I chose homophobia and all that jazz that’s been going on. But I need another person.”

Great. Honestly, being locked in a closer twice with Inej might be easier, and was starting to sound more appealing with every passing second. Could she still talk to Kaz about it?

“Do you have anything in mind so far?”

“Jesper has offered to do the photography part, and Wylan will do the whole makeup thing. Are you allergic to any makeup?”

“No.” Great. Kaz told Jesper and Wylan about her problems. For a mysterious guy, he really didn’t know how to keep his mouth shut.

In retrospect, it might have been better to call one of them instead of Kaz, but she didn’t want to call one of them and interrupt their very holy, passionate hugging.

“I reserved a small lot just outside of campus. They’re waiting for us there.”

“You just got out of bed.”

“And now I have my shoes on. Let’s go.”

***

The lot was a hollow cube next to some unpopular coffee shops outside of campus. Around her, there were walls filled with graffiti, and the occasional shard of glass dropped from a window.

Inej carried herself with grace - one. One foot in front of the other, never looking down, like she was following an invisible line. Nina looked at her in wonder.

“Nina? Nina?” Inej snapped her fingers. She was wearing a worried look, afraid Nina wasn’t with her. “We’re here.”

“Yeah, cool.” She should really stop zoning out while staring at Inej.

They jumped over a small brick wall and walked through grass that probably hadn’t been cut in the last decade. No, it hadn’t been cut in the last century. Nina walked through grass that reached above her waist.

“You paid for this?”

“I paid one dollar to a person of the male gender who couldn’t have been over 15. I still wonder if someone’s going to kidnap us.”

“Understandable. This grass is probably going to eat me before someone gets to me.”

Inej banged on the metal door. A few seconds later, red haired peeked out.

“Wylan!”

“Nina! Glad Inej finally got someone for her project.”

The sight of Wylan slightly calmed Nina. Slightly. She was still shaking like crazy, trying not to just blurt out her love for Inej right then and there. Although, that could have been a way to end all this in a few seconds. Granted, she didn’t want Jesper or Wylan with her when she talked to Inej, but you can’t always get what you want.

“I still have no idea what I’m doing here other than dancing in front of a camera.”

“Well,” Inej started. She was sitting on the floor, flipping through a sketchbook filled with two female figures dancing together in various ways. Oh, no, no, no. “For my media class, I have to combine an art other than photography with a problem in today’s society and depict it in a series of five photos. I chose to combine dance and homophobia. Seemed fitting.”

“Uh, you already told me that.”

“That’s it. We’ll put some fancy clothes on you once we know exactly what we’re doing. Wylan will help with the artistic makeup I planned. Jesper will be taking the photos with that huge camera over there.” She glanced at the weird watch hanging on the wall behind Wylan and Jesper. “If we hurry, we can get it done before dinner.”

Nina only thought about the smug smile Kaz must be walking around with, knowing the set up he’d come up with was much, much worse than being locked in a closet for a mere two hours.

***

Nina sat in one of the unoccupied corners of the lot, holding a water bottle. Inej and Jesper had left to pick up lunch, and she was just waiting for the moment they walked through the door and she could get her hands on some delicious food.

She had just sent two hours learning how to dance with another person. And that other person was Inej.

_“Nina, put your hand here.”_

_Before she could react, Inej had already grabbed her hand and laid it on her own bare shoulder. Nina never thought a day would come where someone would be guiding her hand through soft skin, but the day had come and the person in question was Inej._

_Her breath hitched as her fingers squeezed slightly on the girl’s shoulders, not letting her get away._

Wylan walked to her and sat down, holding a few makeup brushes and a worried look on his face. “Are you okay?”

“As okay as I can be,” Nina answered. She took a sip from her bottle, trying to avoid talking to Wylan.

“Liar.”

“Hey!”

“Just saying, there’s an awful lot of pining between you and Inej. You should talk to her.”

“You sit there and talk about it like you and Jesper didn’t dance around your feelings for almost an entire semester. Let me suffer in peace, thank you very much.”

Wylan pointed one of the brushes at her, accepting defeat. “Touché.”

_“Touché, You’re doing really well, Nina,” Inej noted._

_Nina blushed and fought the urge to let go of the girl and just disappear for a little while. The pose they were currently doing was the last one, and it proved to be the hardest to learn. Nina had to hold Inej up with one arm, wrapping around the girl’s back and pressing her stomach against her own, and then hold one of her legs with the free arm._

_If the past hour or two had proved anything, it was that Nina would never go into dance with Inej, unless she got it together, and to her, it wasn’t happening any time soon._

Just as the boy got up to put away his things, a loud metallic bang echoed through the lot. “They’re here!” Nina was almost too excited to get her food. Maybe she actually just wanted to see Inej again, but no one needed to know that. She got up, dropping her water bottle, and ran to open the door.

“Nina, Nina, I love your hugs, I really do, but I need to put down this food before I drop it,” Inej said.

“Oh, sorry.” Well, at least Inej loved her hugs. Okay, what? She’d just hugged Inej, unprompted, because she missed her, even though she was gone for about thirty minutes. Great.

“No worries.”

“All I’ve had today is a small bowl of Lucky Charms. Without milk. I need food,”

Inej smiled and walked by Nina. Even when holding an ungodly amount of food, Inej was still as graceful as always.

“If you need to buy groceries, make a list and I’ll get it. We all know what happens when you try to do grocery shopping alone.”

Inej and Jesper laid down the bags in the one empty table, and Jesper couldn’t keep his laugh in. When Nina shot him her signature death ray look, he immediately turned away.

They took everything out, and Nina was holding her burger in less than ten seconds of the sight. She sat on the table, alternating between inhaling her burger and chomping down on her fries, but her gaze was always on Inej.

The shorter girl sat against one of the table legs, actually savoring the food she’d just brought in. Jesper said one of his usual quips, and everyone laughed. Nina kept her eyes on Inej, who just smiled and kept eating.

A few minutes later, everyone was done eating. Wylan collected the wrappers and boxes and put them in the bags, which he put away next to the door.

“So, what’s up next?” Nina asked.

“We are getting dressed up, Wylan over there puts some makeup on us and then we just do the five poses we’ve been rehearsing.”

Inej walked away and came back with two black bags. One of them had her name on it, and the other one had Nina’s name.

“Thanks. Where are we supposed to change?”

“In that corner. I’m sorry but I couldn’t get a lot with rooms.”

“That’s okay.” Oh, Saints. Kaz probably rented Inej the lot through an email, knowing perfectly what she’d have to do. That guy just couldn’t stop for a second and do something without a plan. Oh, well, she could always turn away from Inej while she changed.

“Jesper! Wylan! Turn away or I’ll stab you both with the tripod!”

“Damn, Nina,” Jesper said.

Inej looked at Nina. “And if she can’t do it, I’ll take her place.”

Nina just smiled and moved to one of the corners, away from people. Inej was on her side, in a good but also very terrifying way.

The bag had a short white dress that, for some reason, fit her perfectly. She didn’t feel like questioning it, it was probably Kaz. Again.

Nina finished putting on the dress and turned to Inej, trying to see if she was ready. The girl was already in different clothes, putting on some ballet slippers.

In that moment, Nina knew what she was doing was well worth it. Inej’s hair was loose, waves cascading down her neck, stopping just before her legs. Her dark eyes gleamed with happiness, and her smile matched the feeling.

This was Inej’s thing, her element. Nina felt a pang in her chest, almost like she felt bad for invading her personal space.

“Nina! Come here, I need to put some makeup on you,” Wylan said.

Nina looked at the red haired boy, and he had this weird and big makeup thing set up on the lunch table. She walked over to him, and looked through what he had. Eyeshadows, foundations, every makeup item known to man. She knew what everything was, but actually using it? Not her thing.

“Inej is done already?”

“Her makeup was really easy, but yours will take longer. So, I’m gonna have you sit on the table, since you’re gonna have makeup on your face, arms and legs.”

“Arms and legs?”

“That’s what Inej told me to do. Here, take a look at her sketch while I get all the brushes.”

Nina held a piece of paper with a female silhouette on it. But it wasn’t the mainstream dancer on the page. Nina saw herself in it. She looked at all the makeup spots. Just some natural glam on the face, and wounds to make it seem her blood was rainbow. Could be worse.

“You done?” Wylan asked. He extended his hand to get the notebook back from Nina’s shaky hands.

Nina nodded and handed Wylan the sketch, he’d needed more than her.

He drew splotches all over her body, and painted them a beautiful shade of rainbow. He even found a way to incorporate glitter into the makeup.

“There. I don’t have a mirror that will show your whole body at once, but I guess you’ll see how you look like in the pictures.”

“Thanks, I’m sure I look amazing.”

“Confidence is key, Nina.”

Nina jumped off the table and went to meet Inej. The girl was stretching on the future photography dance floor. She looked… beautiful.

“Nina, ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

***

For the past few hours, Nina had been in her personal heaven and her personal hell. To her, both were one and the same. She’d been holding Inej, lifting her in the air and stopping her from falling to the ground.

The way Inej skin felt under her fingers, the way the girl looked at her, with pure happiness in her eyes.

For the last time that day, Nina helped Inej land softly on the white sheet covering the floor.

“Well done, ladies!” Jesper yelled from behind the camera.

Nina sat on the floor. Next to her, Inej breathed softly, barely making noise even after dancing for an hour straight. Her hair still looked perfect, and her eyes still gleamed with hope.

They sat together in silence, as Wylan and Jesper packed up and left.

“Nina, you. You did well.”

“Thanks.”

Nina’s head buzzed with thoughts wanting to escape. Her love for Inej, how she wanted to touch her skin again, the way her heart beat whenever they looked at each other, how she loved her eyes, how-

“Nina, you there?” Inej waved her hand in front of Nina’s eyes. Did she really zone out that hard?

“Yeah, yeah. Sorry. Should we go?”

“Yeah, the boys are probably waiting for us.” The shorter girl smiled and jumped to her feet. Nina watched her feet land softly on the floor every time she took a step. She didn’t think that, when you actually liked a person, you noticed their walk. But again, it was the little details that made her fall for Inej.

She got up and picked up her bag, next to the door. Inej left the huge metal cube and Nina followed. Soon, they were jumping over the small brick wall again, but they were covered by the darkness of the night this time.

Time passed by too quickly. Nina thought she’d spent not enough time dancing with Inej, and yet it had taken an eternity for the moment to stop.

“Are we going back to the dorms?”

“Not yet, Kaz said he wanted to have dinner at Denny’s. Kaz. Eating at Denny’s.”

Nina was going to yell at Kaz when she saw him. When she asked for help, she thought that he would leave a note or something, not that he would build an intricate plan in minutes and then put it in motion. But then again, Kaz.

“Of course he did,” Nina mumbled not so silently, because right after she closed her mouth, Inej dragged her into an alley they were just passing by.

“What?”

“What? Inej, what was that?”

“What did you say?”

“Oh, I was just wondering why Kaz would have dinner at Denny’s.”

“Sorry, I… I don’t know what came over me.”

“Is everything okay?”

“I heard Wylan and Jesper talk while they were setting up a few things. They mentioned a plan, the ultimate plan, I think. I heard my name in the middle of their conversation, but I’m not sure if I heard yours.”

“Damn it, Kaz.”

“You know about this plan?”

“Unfortunately. Inej, I am so sorry for what I’m about to say.”

“You’re sorry for what, exactly? Unless you killed my sister, I don’t see why you have to apologise to me.”

“So, yesterday night I called Kaz. For help.”

“Why? When you need help, call me, or Wylan. Hell, even Jesper or Matthias. You how Kaz helps. It’s not always good. He’s our friend, but his methods are… let’s just say unorthodox.”

“See? I do need to apologise. But I couldn’t call you. And I didn’t want to disturb the others.”

“Nina, we’re roommates. We’re friends. You can always talk to me, I don’t care where I am or what I am doing. If you need anything, tell me.”

“You are my problem.”

“What? How the hell am I your problem, Nina?”

“I like you.”

“Doesn’t really seem like it.”

“Trust me. You’re the first thing on my mind when I wake up, and the happy place I travel to when I sleep. I used up an entire pen writing because my feelings about you were too much to keep just in my head. And I called Kaz because I needed to talk to a real person.”

Inej didn’t say a word, but Nina recognized that face. She’d only seen it one time, when Inej found out her parents had cut her tuition fund, leaving her to take on student loans.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier, Inej. I didn’t know how to.” Tears streamed down Nina’s face. Her lips trembled with every word, scared Inej would just walk away.

Nina tried to look Inej in the eye, but the girl always looked away. A dark alley was the worst place she could have chosen to profess her probably unrequited love. Now, they were both angry at each other, but too tired to do anything about it.

Inej turned away, her long hair shining in the moonlight. It was dark as the night surrounding them, yet it shone as brightly as a star. Nina observed the girl, who kept still and refused to make a sound.

“Inej,. I’m sorry. I’ve put this burden on you, and you probably don’t even feel the same way. Can we just ignore this ever happened and go meet the others?”

Inej slowly turned to Nina. “I’m not gonna ignore this, Nina.”

“Are you mad at me?”

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner? We could have avoided all this.”

“I was too scared of rejection, and you’re my best friend and roommate. I didn’t want to make things awkward if you rejected me.”

Once again, Inej stood there in silence, but this time, she looked at Nina the entire time. Nina felt the girl’s eyes evaluating her body, and then her soul.

“Please say something.”

“I like you.”

Wait, wait, wait. Inej Ghafa, the Inej Ghafa, was in front of her, flesh and bone, and just said the words _I like you_. To Nina. Inej Ghafa liked Nina.

“You do?”

“Yes. I would have told you sooner if I knew you liked girls.”

“I don’t exactly keep it a secret.”

“It was a secret to me.”

Inej stepped forward, almost closing the distance that had formed between their bodies. Her hands cupped Nina’s cheeks. “Can I kiss you?”

“Yes, you can.”

Nina held Inej by the waist, pulling the girl even closer. She had waited too long for this moment, and she intended on making it special. She leaned forward and kissed Inej’s lips, her soft lips. For a while, the only thing Nina cared about was the girl she was kissing. The world around them faded to black, and she was ecstatic.

Inej pulled away, but her hands rested around Nina’s neck “Again?”

Between the tears, Nina finally smiled. She nodded.

Inej stood on the tips of her toes and kissed Nina with passion. Nina adjusted her grip on the girl and squeezed her body tighter. She wanted Inej. She had wanted her for so long, and now she had her.

This time, Nina pulled away. Both girls held on to each other, not wanting to let go.

“You’re an amazing kisser, no doubt. However, it’s almost midnight and the others are still waiting for us.”

“Yeah. I still can’t believe Kaz is having dinner at Denny’s.”

They turned their heads to the outside of the alley, trying to spot a light up sign somewhere.

“Hey, I think it’s the Denny’s across the street,” Nina said.

“Good point. Oh, I am not waiting to see Kaz.”

“Yeah, me neither. Maybe we can stab him with Jesper’s tripod.”

Inej smiled. Nina gripped her hand harder and they walked into that damn Denny’s.

***

The Denny’s was as full as you’d expect at almost midnight on a school day. Empty, except for the rowdy group in one of the booths drawing the attention of all the servers.

When Nina and Inej walked in, hand in hand, they immediately found the booth by following the noise. Mainly Wylan’s giggling and Jesper’s inappropriate comments.

“Hello, bitches.”

“Nina. Inej. You finally got it together,” Kaz said.

“Literally,” she shot back. The comment made her grip Inej’s hand even harder than before. If she did it again, Inej would need a new one.

The guy smiled and stood up so they could sit. Nina leaned against the wall and Inej leaned against Nina. Throughout this whole ordeal, no one let go of the hand hold.

“You’re still wearing the white dress,” Jesper said.

“It’s comfortable, and I didn’t feel like changing.”

“Fair point.”

With perfect timing, a server came by with four menus and such a tired face. “Here are your menus.” She dropped them on the table and left before anyone could ask any questions.

“Nina, Jesper,” Wylan started, “you better not order an ungodly amount of food. I want to eat and leave and then fall on my bed so I can sleep.”

“Sure thing, chief.” Nina laughed and pulled out one of the menus. She opened it and laid it in a way Inej could also read it.

After a few minutes of Wylan convincing Jesper not to order three doses of pancakes and Kaz wondering why the hell he chose a Denny’s as a good place to meet, the server came by again, notepad in hand.

“What are you youngins ordering?” Youngins? They were in their second year of college, and the server was just a few years older, even though Nina thought she’d probably done crack more than a few times.

One by one, they told her their food and drink order. “I’ll have your drinks in a minute.” She picked up the menus and left.

“Nina, didn’t think you were Inej’s type.”

“Me neither, Matthias. Me neither.”

Inej let her head rest on Nina’s shoulder and smiled. “Well, she’s my type, as you can obviously see.”

The blonde guy just nodded, shifting his focus to the animal silhouette on the wall.

Nina looked at Inej, who was cuddling her at this point, and smiled. Inej looked up at Nina and returned the smile. Hopefully, they would become that couple that always cuddled in public, and was just disgustingly cute at all times and oh, she was describing Wylan and Jesper. She wanted a relationship like Wylan and Jesper.

Minutes passed. The guys spent most of the time interrogating Nina and Inej, but they were always able to deflect the question or answer it with a joke that made everyone laugh and forget the question in the first place.

Jesper and Wylan were flirting endlessly, and just as Nina was going to yell at them to go screw in the bathroom or something, the first wave of food came in.

The server had already handed them the drinks, water for everyone, surprisingly.

Wylan, Inej and Matthias grabbed their plates, but they didn’t start eating.

“Guys, eat. I take literally five minutes to eat my food.”

Wylan smiled and turned to Jesper. “You see, it’s this thing called manners. You should really learn some.”

The server came by again with the rest of the plates. Everyone dug into their food, and in about ten minutes, it was all gone.

Jesper turned to Inej. “Well, you eat a lot faster than I expected.”

“Do not underestimate the people who worked the entire day and only ate a burger and some fries.”

Nina high-fived Inej under the table.

“So, what about payment?” Matthias asked.

Kaz called the server over and asked for the check.

“Well, I’d say we all leave a ten dollar bill. It covers the bill and still leaves a hefty tip. The poor girl that served us right now deserves it.”

Everyone reached for their wallets and put on the table ten dollars. Jesper decided to be funny and put ten one dollar bills on the table. Nina held on to Inej’s hand, fighting the urge not to slap the guy.

“Time to leave,” Kaz noted.

The group got up and exited the Denny’s.

***

The group navigated through the dark streets, finding their way back to the dorm buildings.

Kaz walked in the front, holding on to his crow cane, followed by Matthias, who kept his mouth closed the entire time.

Jesper and Wylan flirted, and flirted, and flirted. And flirted. Nina and Inej looked at the couple and laughed.

Nina held Inej’s hand, keeping the girl close to her. It was a fall night where spring seemed to come early. The warm air made for a pleasant walk through campus, looking at the dark gardens.

When they reached the dorm building, Matthias stopped on the first floor and said his goodbyes to the group. Kaz, Jesper and Wylan stopped on the second floor, leaving Nina and Inej alone. Finally.

They went into their room. Inej let go of Nina’s hand and turned on most of the lights.

“One hell of a day,” Nina said. She sat on the couch and turned on the TV. It was still on TLC, but she couldn’t care less about what was on, she just needed some background noise while she waited for Inej to return from their bedroom.

“I’m back. What do you want to do?”

“Many, many things, but I’m too tired to do any of them. For example, I have a chemistry paper due on Monday and I’m not even halfway through it.”

“I feel you. We can be productive together, if you want. The pictures we took today are also due on Monday.”

“Let’s be productive, then.”

Nina went to her room and brought back two laptops, their respective chargers and an extension cord so they could be together.

“Here’s your laptop, beautiful soul.”

Inej smiled. “Could you set this up while I go get my camera?”

“Sure.”

Inej left the room, leaving Nina to put the electronics up and running. She’d done this more than a thousand times, but now that she finally had a girlfriend, it was weird to be alone.

Her eyes lit up when Inej came back holding her camera.

“I’m here. Is everything ready?”

“Let me just turn this on and we’ll be good to go.”

With the push of a button, their laptops came to life.

Nina came out from under the table, grabbed her laptop and sat on the couch, searching for the incomplete first draft that she was going to submit once she was finished, because there was no way in hell she would have time to edit it.

“So, what’s your paper about?”

“A synthesis of some chemical stuff that’s also organic.”

“Well, I see you know everything about that.”

“Yeah. I should really research it now.”

For about an hour or two, Nina sat next to Inej, researching faster than light for her paper. Every once in a while, she’d glance over at what Inej was doing. Inej kept adding special effects to the background, magic coming out of their hands, but never tried to fix their bodies.

“I need a break. because I can’t feel my legs any more,” Nina said. She laid the laptop down on the coffee table and staggered to the little area they called a kitchen.

She grabbed a glass of water and staggered back over to the couch, where Inej kept working.

“Do you need a break?”

“No, I feel fine.”

They resumed working on their projects. Nina spent the better part of two hours coming up with an intro to replace the one she’d written, because there was no way she would submit it. She was not going to edit anything, but she had standards and didn’t want to disappoint her professor. Again.

The following two hours were just Nina bullshitting her way through a paper she was supposed to work on over two weeks, but she chose to do it in a few hours, because panic is one hell of a motivator.

When Nina clicked the “submit” button, it was like someone had just told her she’d never have to work any more, they’d do everything for her. From what she’d seen on the class moodle, she was one of the first people to submit the paper, so she definitely didn’t disappoint her teacher.

After putting her laptop away, she leaned into Inej. “So, how’s it going?”

“I’ve actually just finished the final photo. Wanna see how everything turned out?”

“Yeah.”

Inej turned the laptop so it was facing Nina, and reset the slideshow.

Holy shit, Nina’s eyes were blessed. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Without a single retouch, Nina thought her body looked more beautiful than ever. Around them, there was an explosion of colors that quickly faded to black, putting them in their own little bubble.

Nina loved it. Her true spirit was captured in one of the most delicate forms of art she knew, and she had Inje to thank for that. She never doubted her.

“It’s beautiful,” Nina finally said.

“Beautiful pictures for a very beautiful girl,”

***

Their work paid off.

That afternoon (yes, afternoon, because they were up working until the AM and needed some rest), they were free to do whatever they pleased.

It had started with Inej watching some TV and Nina dancing like there was no tomorrow to her musical theatre playlist. Then, she moved on to sing along to the tracks and perform what Playbill would describe as “a flop that was so bad everyone loved it”. Inej still sat on the couch, but she was watching a different movie when Nina moved on to the stage.

Eventually, Nina got tired and went back into the living room, looking for a comfortable place to sit on.

“Nice singing back there.” Inej paused the movie she was watching and turned to Nina.

“You serious?”

“Yeah, I like your singing.”

  
  


Inej sat next to Nina and leaned her head on Nina’s shoulder, just like she’d done at Denny’s.

“Stop thinking about school for a while.”

“I’ll try. Hey, do you know why Kaz chose a Denny’s? We both know he hates food chains.”

“Maybe he was being considerate of us.”

“That would be new.”

Nina looked at Inej. The girl was curled next to her, her entire body on top of the couch. Her head rested on Nina’s shoulder, dark wavy hair cascading down her back.

“Can we even get Netflix on this thing? I mean-”

Inej ripped the remote of Nina’s hands and laughed at her difficulty. “You see this red N right here?” She pointed to one of the biggest buttons on the remote and clicked it. “There. Now, let’s pray you actually paid for it.”

Nina took back the remote and selected her profile on the account she shared with Inej. “What do you wanna see?”

“That police comedy Jesper constantly talks about. I heard the representation on that show is the best of any sitcom.”

“We love a caring activist.”

“You better.”

Nina smiled and scrolled through her list until she found the title. Inej had recommended it to her months ago, but school and (un)requited crushes got in her way, and she never bothered to see how she could actually watch Netflix in her tiny dorm room.

“Here it is. Whoa, that theme song is loud as hell.”

For the next two hours, Nina watched the show with a smile on her face. Inej laughed at all the jokes, and she thought it was super cute.

Inej, during that time, slowly dragged her body until it she was sitting on Nina’s lap. Nina couldn’t complain. Cuddling was one of her favorite things to do, and it was even better when she had a girlfriend.

Girlfriend. Girl. Friend. Girlfriend. The word rang in Nina’s mind. It had a nice touch to it, and for the first time, a face.

It sounded good, it felt good, and that was all that mattered.


	2. ii

_ Months later _

Nina couldn’t remember when the sun rays had become that bright. Even with two layers of curtains covering the window, she still woke up at 7 AM.

The spot next to her was empty and the sheets were messy. Inej had already got up. Once the realization came to Nina, the smell of waffles and bacon came through the non existing door.

She threw the sheets to the side and got up. She could barely walk or open her eyes at that time in the morning, but anything goes for a good plate of waffles and bacon.

“Morning.”

“I do not know how you can speak to other people so early.”

“I’ve decided to make breakfast, since you never eat it, and even if you tried to cook, you’d probably set the dorm on fire.”

“Okay, the last time I tried to cook, I only set the microwave oven on fire, so shut up.”

“And who bought a new one?”

“Touché.”

Nina sat on the couch and dragged the coffee table closer to her. It was the only piece of furniture they had that allowed her to eat and watch TV at the same time.

She glanced back to the small kitchen area. Inej was humming a cute melody worthy of every award she could think of, while stacking waffle after waffle after waffle.

“You’re gonna eat that many waffles?”

“No, but you are.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Get over here, and bring the waffles. I’m hungry and want to cuddle with my girlfriend.”

Inej’s smile made her day. Granted, she still had a lecture in the afternoon, but still, it didn’t take Inej much to make Nina happy.

She grabbed the remote and started searching Netflix for whatever title she thought Inej would like. Just after she pressed play on whatever movie she’d selected, she grabbed a fork and put half a waffle in her mouth, all before Inej could give an opinion on what she would like to watch.

“Let me guess. This movie has lesbians in it?”

“You bet.”

***

Nina opened her eyes and looked at the clock on the TV. 1 PM. She’d been asleep for a while, then. Her head turned back to the girl laying in her lap, still sound asleep.

Inej looked like a little angel. Her soft hair was wrapped up in a bun that was starting to come undone. Her lashes fluttered for a bit until she opened her eyes.

“Hello, sunshine.”

“What time is it?”

“1 PM.”

“We should really get lunch.” She held onto Nina while trying to sit up on the couch. “And maybe order it, I don’t really feel like going out now.”

“Sure. Now, what should we order?”

“Chinese? The place down the street has delivery options and great food. Oh, by the way, the next time you choose something on Netflix, look it up before we watch it. The movie was so boring.”

“You’re definitely right. And Chinese sounds amazing. I’ll order the usual.”

Ordering was — how could she say this — a challenge. No one answered the phone for the first ten minutes, and it was another ten minutes before the order went through, because the guy who answered was drunk, high, or both.

Nina hung up and almost threw her phone across the dorm, but fortunately, before doing that, she remembered the phone was expensive and the best course of action was to just put the phone down. Calmly.

“That was a tough one,” Inej said.

Nina walked over to her girlfriend, who had been watching the whole scene from afar. “No shit. I’d stab the couch if I had a knife.”

“Okay, we should move away from the knives, then. I do not want to buy a new couch, those are more expensive than two of your phones.”

“True. What do you want to do while we wait for the food?”

“We could continue watching the cop show from last night.”

“Let me just say this, you have a brilliant mind. The dance program is lucky to have you.”

Inej smiled and let out a little laugh before grabbing Nina’s hand and dragging her to the couch.

Nina threw herself on top of the pillows, but the position she landed in was not comfortable. She sat up straight, and realized that sitting in a correct position was actually good for your body. “Sit on my lap, or next to me. I just want cuddles.”

“You always want cuddles.”

“Can you blame me?”

“Not really, I’m an amazing cuddler.”

Nina leaned in and kissed Inej. She was the best cuddler, the best hugger, the best kisser. She was Nina’s favorite person.

Inej pulled away and reached for the remote. “Now, we laugh.”

***

Before the episode was even over, someone knocked on the door. Nina got up and went to check it out.

Jesper was standing there, holding a bag of Chinese food.

“Is that the food I ordered?”

“Yeah. A delivery guy was standing downstairs, very confused. I assumed you guys ordered it.”

Nina ripped the bag out of hands.

“Rude.”

“Go away, I want to spend the afternoon with my girlfriend.” Nina slammed the door and grabbed two forks before sitting on the couch again.

“Who was it?” Inej asked.

“Jesper. If you want to invite him in, I’m sure he’s still standing at the door.”

“He can stand there all day if he wants to. I just need food, my beautiful girlfriend right next to me and Brooklyn Nine-Nine on the TV.”

“That’s all I need, too.”

Inej sat on Nina’s lap and kissed her before taking everything out of the bag.

“Holy shit, why are there so many containers?” Nina grabbed the biggest one and looked inside. “Yup, this one’s mine. There’s the sauce.”

“Okay, okay. I know you’re hungry, let me get off your lap so we can both eat.”

“Don’t go, I need you.”

“I’m like right here.”

“I know.”

The next hour was filled with hilarious jokes, not so hilarious jokes, Nina eating everything and more, Inej staring in amazement at how much her girlfriend could eat, and lots of cuddles. Lots.

“We should throw this out and wash what needs washing,” Inej noted

“Always the responsible girl.”

“One of us should have brains, you know? I’ll throw out the trash.”

Nina scrubbed the two pieces of cutlery that had been used, and returned to the living room to see Inej had already bagged all the trash.

“Honey, will you be away for a long time?”

“Nina. I’m going downstairs, it’ll be five minutes at most.”

For the next five minutes, Nina scrolled through Instagram, seeing every stupid thing Jesper and Wylan were doing without permission or supervision.

She was listening carefully to the door, and when the doorknob started to turn, she jumped out of the couch.

“Nina, you’re officially the clingiest person I’ve ever met. You’re lucky I really like you.”

Nina wrapped her arms around Inej’s waist and pulled her closer. She kissed Inej and let the world around them float away for a little while.

Inej pulled away. “Uh, not to be a killjoy or anything, but we should really close the door.”

Nina kicked the door, which did absolutely nothing to close it. Inej stepped away and actually closed it.

“I don’t want to buy a new door, either.”

“Yeah. Wanna keep watching the show?”

“I was thinking we could actually go outside for once.”

“And do what?”

“Just sit there and relax, or go for a walk.”

“Anything for you. Let me just put my shoes on.”

Nina ran to her room and put on the first pair of shoes she grabbed. When she came back out, she noticed they were bright pink, but they were cute.

“Love the shoes.”

“Yeah.”

Nina grabbed Inej’s hand and they exited the dorm. At that time of day, there weren’t many people outside the dorm rooms, most of them were studying, procrastinating or sleeping.

Inej insisted on taking the stairs, and after about twenty or thirty flights, Nina could barely feel her legs.

“You know, I think the elevators were just next door.”

“We can just sit outside, if you want.”

“I want to sit somewhere pretty, though.”

A warm breeze swept Nina’s hair into her face, mainly her mouth.

Inej caressed Nina’s hand with her thumb and smiled. When Nina noticed, she smiled, too. This was just… so nice, so different of what Nina thought she deserved or what she would be able to get.

She often thought she’d end up alone, dying in a barely clean apartment, or dead in a dark alley because no one cared enough to save her. But Inej did. Inej cared so much she made breakfast whenever she could, she complimented Nina all the time, she helped Nina study even though she probably didn’t understand a word of Nina’s notes.

“I think this is a good spot.” Nina pointed to an empty bench between two trees. Their green leaves formed a flowery arch over the bench.

“It’s really pretty.”

Nina looked around. They were surrounded by all kinds of nature. Green bushes lined the pathways she’d walked through seconds prior. Flowers spurt in between bushes, in the trees, everywhere. The trees themselves were tall and dominated the landscape.

To her right, there was a small rose bush that had roses all around. It wouldn’t miss a rose or two. She reached for the bush and ripped one of the flowers not facing the pathway.

“Inej, I have something for you. Be careful, though.”

“What is it?”

Nina handed her the rose she’d just picked. Inej’s face lit up as soon as she saw Nina’s gift. She took off her jacket and wrapped it around the flower.

“It’s so pretty.”

“A pretty flower for a very pretty girl.”

Inej smiled from ear to ear. Nina was ecstatic that she liked this spontaneous gift. Inej had done so much for her, and she’d never been able to repay it. A heartfelt gift wasn’t everything, but Nina knew it was the start.

Many more people walked. Some of them frowned at the sight of two girls holding hands, others didn’t even notice. One person, however, stood out to Nina.

The guy was leaning against a brick wall, wrapped up in a black coat, holding a cane. He didn’t do anything else, he just was there.

A few seconds later, something clicked in Nina’s brain. Kaz. Kaz. It was Kaz. Kaz was there.

She turned to Inej. The girl was so happy, looking at the rose she’d been given, and just being in the middle of nature.

Before Nina could figure out what to do, Kaz started walking over to them. Okay, now she couldn’t do anything about it.

“Girls,” he said. Nina was already looking at him, but he waited until Inej was also looking at him to continue speaking. “I see my help is appreciated.”

“Very. How did you know we’d be here?” Inej didn’t sound nearly as nervous as Nina thought she would be. She just spoke in her regular sweet tone.

“I didn’t. I was just walking to the lab when I spotted you two and decided to see where this would end up. Nice gift idea, by the way.”

“That’s not creepy at all,” Nina said. She couldn’t really be upset with him, though, he helped her get the best girlfriend in the first place.

She wrapped her free arm around Inej, waiting for someone to say something and break the awkward silence that had formed.

“Nina, for Inej’s sake, please learn how a supermarket works and what you can absolutely not do inside one.”

“Kaz, I got stuck inside the cart one time. One time. And it was a cart for kids.”

“I don’t really know if you want me to respond to that. Well, I’ll be on my way. You ladies have an amazing afternoon.” Kaz walked away, always gripping his cane.

“What was that?” Inej asked. She moved closer to Nina and leaned her head on the girl’s shoulder.

“Kaz being Kaz.”

“Yeah, you’re right. Guy’s kinda weird. But you have to admit, the grocery shopping thing was tragic, but funny.”

Inej looked away to admire nature, and Nina decided to look at Inej.

“Hey, can I tell you something?” Nina asked. “I know we’ve already talked about it but I want to make things crystal clear.”

“Sure, what is it?” Inej adjusted her body so she was facing Nina. She reached for the girl’s hand and wrapped it around hers.

“Remember when I talked to you about the whole thing where I asked Kaz for help and he built this entire plan? I know it happened months ago, and I understand if you don’t want to talk about it.”

“Vaguely.”

“So, I’m gonna tell you the whole story, because I feel like you deserve it. For months, I built up feelings for you, and I didn’t know what to do. When the first work deadlines started approaching, I just had a breakdown, and I realized my feelings for you were way over the crush stage. I didn’t know who to talk to. Jesper and Wylan were not going to be helpful, and neither was Matthias, so my only choice was Kaz. And we all know how that ended up.”

“With me here, holding my favorite flower, sitting next to my favorite person, having an amazing time.”

Nina smiled through small tears. Inej had a tremendous amount of patience for Nina’s mistakes, and she only hoped to have the same amount for hers.

“Now that we’ve got that out of the way, can I do something?” Inej asked.

“What is it?”

Inej placed the rose on her lap and used the now free hand to cup Nina’s cheek. She leaned in and kissed her girlfriend’s soft lips.

Nina was taken by surprise, but it was something good. She dropped Inej’s hand to pull her body closer.

This kiss was different from the rest. Even the slower ones didn’t have the same feel. This kiss was a big “screw you” to all of those that told Nina she was wrong, to all the people who made her path harder. Now, she was right where she wanted to be.

With Inej. With the one person who made all the bad things go away.

Inej pulled away, but her hands lingered on Nina’s shoulders. “Now it’s my turn to tell you something.”

“Okay.”

“I’ve been very secretive about my love life, and that’s because it was almost non existent. But when I met you, everything made so much sense, and yet it had no sense at all. You are the best thing that has ever come into my life. Nina Zenik, my bright star, I love you.”

Nina was crying. Her heart was beating so hard she thought it would jump out of her body at any moment. What was she supposed to reply? Inej had a way with words Nina could never understand.

“I love you, too.”

Silence took over. They were holding on to each other, just letting the tears flow and not caring about the people passing by.

“Is there something else I’m supposed to say? I suck at this,” Nina said.

“That’s enough, don’t worry.”

Inej sat on Nina’s lap, arms wrapped around the girl’s neck. To make sure Inej didn’t fall, Nina held on to her waist.

This was it. This was what Nina always dreamed of, never thinking she could actually achieve it. But she could, and she did.

She was with the girl she loved, her bright star, and nothing else mattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it! Hours of hard work, many brutal critics later, here is my Grishaverse Big Bang fic :D


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